Confidence is Sexy

What’s sexy? What’s beauty?

I see people trying so hard to be sexy. The younger generation especially but not just – some people never quite figure out what sexy is and keep trying to fit the mold of what they think it is based on TV, movies and magazines. Skin tight clothes, low cut shirts, thigh high slits or whatever they see advertised as being sexy. While those things will grab attention, it won’t stick in anyone’s mind after they’ve moved on. It’s the person who carries themselves with grace, poise and confidence that will be remembered.

A lot of people turn to plastic surgery to add or subtract from whatever feature they deem undesirable in order to appear more attractive. Yet, how many people have you seen that are absolutely sexy and gorgeous with what society would consider flaws. It’s all in how one chooses to carry themselves. If they feel good, it shows.

Personally, I think true beauty comes from confidence. Put two people side by side, male or female and dress them exactly the same. The one that stands out and catches everyone’s eye will be the one who’s confident and comfortable with themselves.

Since I have a teen, I spend a lot of time around teenagers and see so many of them going to extremes to fit the mold of sexy and beautiful. As parents, as society, we owe it to our teens to encourage them to embrace every feature and attribute they were born with and to be confident. ┬áIt’s that confidence that shines through and grabs everyone’s attention. Besides why would anyone want to look like the next person? It’s the uniqueness in each of us that stands out. Embrace it, love it.

I wish I had this figured out when I was younger. It would have saved me so much time and energy trying to find out who I was and wondering what I could do to look beautiful and sexy just like the ones in the magazines. The simple answer to that is nothing. Everyone is gorgeous in their own way and the beauty comes through when you finally get that in your head.

Sexiness and beauty is in us all. We just need to stop turning to the media for validation and have confidence in what we, each of us, have.




The Coveted Cover Photo

Getting one’s face on the cover of a magazine is typically considered an accomplishment. It says, “Look at me, I’m known, I’m famous, I’m somebody!” Especially on fashion and entertainment magazines. So why on earth would a magazine like Rolling Stone put a picture of the man responsible for destroying hundreds of lives at the Boston Marathon on its cover? It’s beyond comprehension to me.

They say that it’s an in depth look at a troubled man. It’s a hard hitting story that they include as well as their entertainment stories. Fine, have the article but instead of putting his face on the cover, why not put the faces of the brave victims who are struggling to get their lives back together? Have his story in the back after the survivors.

Seems to me that our newspeople, magazines and books tend to sensationalize people who have done especially horrendous deeds. As we all know, with the number of reality shows out there, there are a lot of people willing to go to any lengths just to get their faces known. I find it very hard to believe that the couples featured on the “Bridezillas” show are really that rude and obnoxious and still get married after all that drama. “Wife Swap” is another one, why would any self respecting person allow themselves to be put through that type of humiliation that I see so much on there. This leads me to believe that there are a tremendous amount of individuals who are desperate for recognition and fame, however short it may be.

With that being said, how many sick individuals do you guess there are out there who will look at the fact that a bomber who killed and maimed hundreds of people, actually got his face on a cover of a magazine, a huge magazine at that too, and think that might be a way to get famous?

I’ve often wondered if the media did more stoic, straight up reporting on these killers instead of glorifying and sensationalizing details of these people, if the violence rate would go down? Maybe I’m being too idealistic, but anytime there’s a huge story out there about murder, violence or any other sort of awful thing it seems that they just want to play and replay the horrific details over and over again. They take the person who was responsible for the act and just spend so much time talking about them, their lives. Speculating on why, how and what their thought processes may have been before, during and after… blah, blah, blah. I say just report the story as we all have the right to know what is going on around us, but stop there. The media stories will do SO much talking and dissecting of the person committing these acts that I can’t help but wonder if these individuals enjoy it in their own sick way.

It’s like raising kids, when a child misbehaves you don’t give them attention. You impose consequences for the bad behavior by putting them in a corner, taking something away from them, restricting activities, but you don’t go on and on to glorify what they’ve done. It only teaches them that it’s a way to get attention. To ensure that everyone is talking about them. Regardless of whether it’s negative talking or not. They’re just enjoying the attention. Why can’t the media industry realize that they could be doing the same thing for those aggressors that do awful things. They do not deserve attention. They do not deserve to bask in the limelight, however negative it may be. The story should be reported and then tucked away into the background for the courts to deal with.

Keep the public informed, but stop making them the center of attention. And for goodness sakes, why put their faces on a cover of a magazine?

Zimmerman Trial

They just announced the verdict in the Zimmerman trial. “Not Guilty”

How is it that a young 17 year old boy loses his life simply by walking home after purchasing a few items at a convenience store and there’s no justice?

I have not been following the trial closely although I’ve been aware of the story since the whole thing happened. I realize that there may have been many factors that the jury had to take into consideration to lead them to the conclusion that they did, but I just can’t get past the fact that a young man at the beginning of his life journey lost his opportunity to live due to an overzealous neighborhood watchman.

The only people who really knows what happened that night would be George Zimmerman and Trayvon Martin. It may have all been a tragic mistake, but had Zimmerman simply stayed put after calling 911, Trayvon would most likely still be alive today. I think that Zimmerman was within his rights to report what he may have thought to be suspicious activity, but when he got out of his vehicle to follow Trayvon and with a loaded gun, he became the aggressor in my mind. As I said, no one will ever know the exact details except those two and sadly one of them isn’t around to share his side of the story.

I’m not going to sit here and judge. It’s not my place to do so, but my heart goes out to the Martin family for the loss of their son.

That All Knowing Eye in the Sky…


Opened up my mail and I see this picture of my car along with a fine for not coming to a complete stop at a red light. Ugh, like I really need to be paying out 158.oo. I’ve been working so hard to try and get ahead of that paycheck to paycheck thing and here this ticket shows up and puts me back. Not cool at all!

But that isn’t what Im feeling creeped out about. Getting a ticket – Okay, so fine. I guess I screwed up and turned after only coming to a rolling stop. There were no cars and I needed to get to work. Next time I’ll definitely be more careful.

No, the creepy part is seeing me and my car photographed in on the paper that they sent me. To know that I’m being watched without really realizing it. It kind of brought home that we truly have arrived in that Big Brother age where we are watched just about 24/7 no matter where we are, with the only exception being when we are in our own homes. I have mixed feelings about it. There are so many instances where surveillance cameras have actually pinpointed a criminal or caught on to some outrageous act that shouldn’t be condoned, that’s where it’s really good to have them around. However, it does feel rather like I’m being violated when I see myself or my car on camera. When I looked at my car on that little piece of paper, I wondered just how many other instances I’m captured on camera. No matter how you look at it, it’s rather embarrassing to think of it. It’s almost as if we need to walk around looking fine and saying cheese all the time in public.

It’s kind of sad, I’m old enough to remember times when we could go be goofy, crazy and just be ourselves without wondering if there’s something watching. It’s almost better to have an actual cop show up with flashing lights to give you a ticket right then and there than to find something in the mail weeks after the fact. It just feels weird. You know?? It’s just better to be punished for something at the moment you’re doing the “crime”, rather than weeks later when you barely remember it. I guess that’s the age we finally arrived at. It’s been talked about for years. Movies have been made regarding the whole Big Brother watching thing for years. Now, we’re truly here and I”m not so sure I appreciate my privacy being invaded like that on a daily basis.

I’m sort of amused at the moment as I write this because I’m realizing that I’ve arrived at the point where I can reminisce about the “good ol’ days”. I used to laugh at the older folks for always talking about the past. “Just move on and get with the present.” I would always think. Today, I’m realizing that yes, the past was a simpler time. It was a time when we could just let loose and have some innocent fun without so many people being evil. We could play and be ourselves without wondering if something or someone is watching.

You know what, I realize times change. Things are different and will continue to change as the years go by, but I honestly wouldn’t trade my time for anything. Being watched and captured on cameras all over town just isn’t that appealing to me and I’m sure it’s only going to get worse in the future.